When you’re crafting a child custody plan, it’s easy to think about the facts: when you have to go to work, when your child goes to school, and other dates and times. You’re trying to agree on a schedule that works.

Don’t forget to think about feelings, too. Remember to consider how hard joint custody can be on your child.

For example, one divorced mother said that she had her daughter one week and then the girl’s father — and his new wife — had the daughter the next week. They constantly switched back and forth.

If you’re just adding up hours, this is fair. That doesn’t mean it’s easy. She said her daughter often struggled with simply missing her mom on the weeks when she was away. This didn’t mean she didn’t love her father, but she wanted to see both parents.

They were creative in finding a solution. When the girl was living with her father, they set things up so that the mother went to the child’s school and had lunch with her.

This way, no one’s rights were infringed upon. The father and mother both got equal time with the child. At the same time, though, it addressed the reality of the situation and gave the young girl the time she needed to touch base with her mother.

Creativity can be a good thing when it comes to child custody agreements and parenting plans. Be sure you know your rights, but also remember to consider the best interests of the child and do everything in your power to make sure they’re met.

Source: Idealist Mom, “When You Can’t Stand the Pain of Missing Your Child,” accessed Aug. 11, 2017